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How Heather Dubrow Supports Her 3 LGBTQIA+ Children in the Fight Against Homophobia

​​​​​​​View Date:2024-12-24 01:04:21

As a wise man once said love is love is love is love is love is love is love is love. But nothing trumps a mother's love for her kids—just ask Heather Dubrow.

As a parent, her main role is "to support them and defend them and take care of them and guide them," The Real Housewives of Orange County star explained in an exclusive interview with E! News. "So whoever your children are and however they identify, that's your job: Love them, protect them, take care of them." 

In the years since daughter Max, 20, came out as bisexual, daughter Kat, 17, announced to the family that she's gay and son Ace, 13, revealed he's transgender, Heather and her husband, Botched doctor Terry Dubrow have done just that. 

"But the most important lesson I can give to a parent of an LGBTQ+ child, or any child, is to listen," stressed Heather, also mom to 20-year-old Nick, "because people just want to be heard." 

As parents, she continued, it can be tempting "to talk at our kids and give them our words of wisdom and teach them our lessons. And the truth is, you learn a lot more by listening and it helps them more to let them speak."

While her kids are talking the talk, the 55-year-old is walking the walk, using her reality TV platform to bring light to issues that affect the LGBTQIA+ community. 

"I work with so many different groups," said Heather, name-checking The Trevor Project and GLAAD as well as her recent partnership with Family Equality and Equality Vines that saw her release a line of wines benefitting the nonprofit. And when she turns up to volunteer at the Los Angeles LGBT Center, she noted, the rest of the fam tags along: "Everyone gets involved." 

And while she'll happily don allllll the rainbow gear to celebrate Pride Month, "I look forward to the day when we don't need the parades," Heather said, "not that I don't love them and the celebrations, but wouldn't it be great when everyone can just be?"

Her crew, at least, does a fairly good job of living their best lives. 

Acknowledging that "it's a beautiful thing" that her kids felt comfortable coming out at a young age, Heather said, "I came from a family that was very 1950s and no one ever talked about anything and everything was sort of brushed under the rug." 

So she vowed at a young age "that if I were lucky enough to have a family, I would be the opposite of that," she continued. "And so I have to say I'm proud of them, I'm proud of me, I'm proud of us as a family for having the communication that we have." Though she's not above using her Life360 app to keep tabs on her brood when necessary, using the locator device to check, "Okay, she's in the dorm, he's at home," she said. "Everyone's good."

It's even more gratifying for Heather to imagine the sorts of talks she and her family may have sparked simply by existing. 

After a four-season break from her Bravo gig, "We came back to Housewives because I thought, 'Hey we've got this great platform, they're asking us to come back, wouldn't it be nice to show our very normal family and maybe start conversations in other people's families?'" Heather explained. "And I feel like in a little way we've been able to do that, so that's all been really amazing."

In other words, while no one's life is perfect, hers is pretty close. 

"I love my children," said Heather. "They're incredible human beings. And I'm so proud of who they're growing up to be."

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